TERA: hey guys guess how many days we’ve survived. TYPHUS: how many? TERA: 69! TYPHUS: hell yeah. TYPHUS: Wshhhh TERA: Robo wishes she had your skills. TERA: I never know where I’m going, honestly. TERA: I just tell you guys where to go and then I follow you. TERA: it’s been working so far TYPHUS: yeah I mean why- why fix what ain’t broken? TYPHUS: I mean what why fix what’s so broken it can’t be fixed? TYPHUS: okay so we just climbed to that site–
TERA: Fuck! TYPHUS: oh..
GANDURO: Other side. TERA: Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
TYPHUS: Oh no! TYPHUS: Oh no, oh no! GANDURO: You okay?
TERA: I landed in water. I landed in water. TYPHUS: Holy shit, you crazy girl. TERA: I’m sorry! TERA: Yeah I’m literally not gonna move whatsoever TERA: just in case there’s something on the other side of this rock TYPHUS: yeah or you have a million broken bones TYPHUS: and you’re just too much in shock to realize it. TERA: I didn’t lose in your armor. TYPHUS: okay Tera I’m with you TYPHUS: I’m behind you TERA: oh my god, yay! TERA: I’m alive! GANDURO: Oh, fuck! Fuck fuck fuck fuck TYPHUS: Ganduro! GANDURO: I’m down. TYPHUS: you’re down? GANDURO: yeah GANDURO: Augh! Fuck.
TERA: Fuck, I can hear somebody TERA: There’s people here.
TYPHUS: Uhhh TYPHUS: hold on, dude. hold on. TYPHUS: don’t go towards the light. hold on. TYPHUS: I can’t get you. GANDURO: AUUUUGH TYPHUS: Nooooo!
TERA: Hey, Ganduro? TERA: Quit out of the game. TYPHUS: yeah no room for weaklings! Get out! TYPHUS: I hate to kill these babies, they’re so cool! TYPHUS: look they do cartwheels! TERA: that’s why I squish them! TERA: Just stomp on ’em. TERA: I can’t believe my luck, honestly. TYPHUS: yeah GANDURO: Sure wish I had some. TERA: I’m sorry TYPHUS: what’s funnier, Ganduro, is.. TYPHUS: You fell a shorter distance than she did TYPHUS: we should be able to just go back
TERA: *sputtering* But I have to go down that place again! TERA: I’m going to fall again!
TYPHUS: Just jump in the water! TERA: I’m gonna fall, and I won’t live this time! TYPHUS: You did it once by accident; if you actually plan it you can probably do it. TERA: no, it’s… I can’t push my luck! this is it’s it’s too much. TYPHUS: Tera, go save. TERA: one sec TYPHUS: I said, go fucking save. TERA: Jeez, so pushy. TYPHUS: Do you guys wanna tell stories? TYPHUS: There was once this girl who was like “let’s go into this cave!” and then she fell right? We all thought she was dead and then we looked at it she actually landed in the one fucking spot that doesn’t kill you. TERA: not only that, didn’t land in the spot where the monsters could see her TYPHUS: yeah exactly! TYPHUS: holy shit TYPHUS: I’m gonna be right back. There’s a pitbull that wants to come see me. BLUE: Armsy! BLUE: I seeeee you, you motherfucker TERA: …Blue? BLUE: Hm? TERA: What are you doing? BLUE: Nothing. BLUE: Just taking a sneak peek. BLUE: And hurting them in the process. BLUE: That’s all I can do. BLUE: Oh, don’t…don’t… TERA: Blue… BLUE: Ooh! He’s so cute when he’s angry! TERA: Blue, what the fuck are you doing. BLUE: Sadly I do not have any molotovs for you. TERA: What’s on the other side? BLUE: Nothing interesting. [Indistinct] TERA: You liar. TERA: You are a lying liar who lies. TYPHUS: Here, this one’s for Robo. Let’s go. TERA: did you set yourself on fire? TYPHUS: yeah TYPHUS: I see a fucking cannibal. I’m gonna whack him. I’m gonna off him. TYPHUS: Then I’m gonna whack him off. TERA: Typhus… TERA: we’ve been over the phrasing. BLUE: *indistinct* TERA: oh shit! TERA: oh shit! TYPHUS: What?
TERA: you were shooting that armsy, weren’t you? BLUE: Yeah! BLUE: Well, you’re gonna see him personally right now. BLUE: Hmm, well maybe not exactly right now. BLUE: but soon. BLUE: Soon enough. TYPHUS: Whoa, do we need the rebreather to go down-
GANDURO: YEP! TERA: What?
TYPHUS: That’s the most excited “Yep” I’ve ever heard. TYPHUS: You didn’t even let me finish my sentence. GANDURO: Big vagina over there! TYPHUS: Oh fuck!
TERA: “Virginia”. TYPHUS: Vagina over there! TYPHUS: Dude, you fucked that vagina
until it died! Holy shit! TERA: Typhus, you’re doing it on purpose now TYPHUS: yeah, that was on purpose. TYPHUS: I’m actually kind of ashamed myself– ashamed of myself. TYPHUS: Ganduro, are we gonna die down here? GANDURO: I did, technically, once. TERA: You’re doing better now though GANDURO: yeah TYPHUS: don’t patronize him. TYPHUS: Blue, can you hold the flashlight under your face? TYPHUS: there you go! TYPHUS: You look so scary! TERA: Oh that does look terrifying! [Armsy roar] TERA: AH, FUCK! FUCKING! OH SHIT! TERA: Ohhh!
TYPHUS: What? TERA: There was like a blow-up-able wall and there was an armsy on the other side and I was looking right at the wall GANDURO: Big one!
TERA: And the armsy broke through, and it scared the shit out of me. TERA: Oh boy. GANDURO: What? TERA: *pathetic scared noise* TERA: I am going to crouch and move very slowly. TYPHUS: Ohhh shit
GANDURO: *whistles* TYPHUS: It’s just water down there
TERA: Oh god GANDURO: There’s a toy leg right here. TERA: Wait. How did I build the toy then, before? TERA: I have all the parts. TYPHUS & BLUE: Ohhhhhhh GANDURO: Someone cheated
TYPHUS: You are cheating TERA: *scoffs* BLUE: Oh, no TERA: I’ve got the footage to prove
that I found all those pieces, okay? TERA: I’ve got the footage to prove it! TYPHUS: holy shit! TYPHUS: what da fuck?! GANDURO: it’s huge. TYPHUS: look at this fucking place! it’s amazing! TERA: There’s also mutants. TYPHUS: Where are they? TERA: Right in front of you
TYPHUS: Oh, I see ’em.
TERA: Yeah. TERA: All around you. TYPHUS: I got ’em!
TERA: Yeah GANDURO: Big fattie over dere. TYPHUS: He has a name, Ganduro. TERA: what is the name? TYPHUS: I have no idea. GANDURO: It is cow man or something like that TYPHUS: it’s the fat fuck, okay? stop
insulting him. TYPHUS: Oh shit!